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What is the formula by which the judges arrive at their decision on the winner?

April 26, 2017arrive decision Formula Judges winner

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What is the formula by which the judges arrive at their decision on the winner?

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(2[topicality] + 4[It’s their turn]) x (press momentum/100) x (genre-ghetto rotation-system constant) + ([how much the judges had from the dessert trolley] – [a blood-sugar constant]) x ([the odds at William Hill] – [the-media-loves-an-upset constant])