Why do recent pictures of Sarah look so different from the ones above?
Because Sarah is a shapeshifter. Somewhere along the course of our relationship, she went from being lovely and Reubenesque to lovely and skinny. She lost 123 pounds over the course of a year. I imagine that at some point during our marriage, she might decide to sprout wings and fly, or to become amphibious. It’s sort of like marrying Mystique from the X-Men comics, except that she won’t drug me and put iron pellets into my ass.
