Why do people tremble with fear when someone comes into a bank carrying a violin case?
They think he’s carrying a machine gun and might be about to use it. Why do people tremble with fear when someone comes into a bank carrying a viola case? They think he’s carrying a viola and might be about to use it. Did you hear about the violinist who bragged that he could play 32nd notes? The rest of the orchestra didn’t believe him, so he proved it by playing one. How many second violinists does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can’t get up that high! String players’ motto: “It’s better to be sharp than out of tune.” Why is a violinist’s fingers like lightening? They never strike the same place twice! Why don’t viola players suffer from piles (hmorrhoids)? Because all the buttholes are in the first violin section. What’s the difference between a fiddle and a violin? No-one minds if you spill beer on a fiddle. Why do violinists put a cloth between their chin and their instrument? Violins don’t have spit valves. Why should you never try to drive a roof nail with a violin?
