Why are the children troubling for most divorced parents?
There are a variety of reasons for this: First, the existence of children means that most parents will continue to be bound together regardless of the amount of anger and resentment felt towards the former spouse. Second, even with shared custody, there is a sense of loss experienced by both parents because they will no longer see their children as frequently as previously, when the marriage was intact. Third, many parents worry about the influence the former spouse has on the children while they are visiting that parent. In one case I dealt with several years ago, the mother complained that her children returned to her from their father’s house extremely unruly and uncooperative. She believed their father talked about her to the children behind her back and did not support her decisions when important issues arose. Her sons, now adolescents and very bright, refused to answer her queries about what their father said to them when they were visiting. Fourth, many divorced parents quarrel
