Why a divorced woman doesn get respect than a first marriage or a widow gets?
Once bitten twice shy and your issues run deeper than your divorce. Women perpetuate a great deal of physical and sexual violence but men turn a blind eye to it. The issue is not from religious reasons. If I was single and dating and found out you were divorced I would want to know why and what went wrong – I want to know it wasn’t “your fault” and want to know you gave an egregious effort to reconcile before calling it quits. If you divorced because “I just wasn’t happy” or “I deserve better” you’re dumped. You need therapy to work on finding your ‘center’ so you at least know your own personal truth and do not need to define yourself by other people’s perceptions.
A divorcee made a choice to end her marriage. A widow did not. That’s the difference. I think that how divorced women are seen depends greatly on where you are in the world. In the U.S. divorce is so common that it’s not taboo to be a divorcee anymore… but you do still get attitudes from people now and then. In other areas of the world where women in general are treated like second class citizens, being a divorced woman is like being an untouchable. I mean, how dare a woman think for herself, or protect herself, or want a life of her own! The only thing you can do is try not to let other people’s judgments get to you.
I’m twice divorced and most of the disrespect comes from the religious community, you know the kind that are taught “judge not less ye be judged”, yet they can’t stop judging. Anyway I have think if someone is not happy, then they should do everything they can to change that. The constitution even states that we have the right to the pursuit of happiness, and sometimes that means divorce. The power of “giving up” is terribly underestimated. So many people will stay in a bad, sad, or abusive situation just so they don’t look like a quitter. Most of the people who have a strong negative opinion about divorce, do so because they either have a happy marriage or don’t have the guts to get out the bad relationship they are in.
