Where In The Hell Is Chuck Bass?
Jenny and Eric foment a sad little Pinkberry revolution against Penelope’s Plastics, but it’s a short-lived bunch of sound and fury that ends when Nelly Yuki reveals she was only backing Jenny’s play for her own sad Mean Girl reasons. Jenny rolls her eyes all world-wisely and freely gives up the Queen B crown like an idiot, but the good news is that this might be the thing that finally sends Penelope barking mad. The show continues its subtle misdirection w/r/t to the rapid decompensation of Blair Waldorf, relying once again on the shiny, histrionic antics of Chuck Bass in its left hand so you don’t notice her slowly being crushed to death in its right. Meet Dirty Sexy Jack, Chuck’s evil, 30-year-old uncle who manages to redeem his lame-ass dead-end Dexter storyline in about three seconds of screentime, located somewhere between hauling Chuck home from Thai opium dens… and the episode-ending reveal that he boned Blair just this week, on New Year’s Eve. Yeah. And then just when you th