When to tell a child they e adopted?
I know, and have known several adoptees for decades. All the ones I know who seem to be happy in their family situations, both reunited and not, had always known that they were adopted, and all knew that they were loved all their lives. Of these people, one is my brother-in-law who was placed, one is a friend adopted at 6 months of age (now 44), and a few other friends. I know 2 kids that I went to school with, who found out they were adopted in their early teens. Both were traumatized at that age, and they had much more identity problems than the ones who’ve known from birth. It’s pretty obvious in our family that our son is adopted. Ironically, he looks more like his late adoptive dad than either of our other sons, and he is blonde like me, where my bio is red-headed, and our other son is black headed. He will always know that he is adopted, and our goal is that he knows all of us parents love him very much. I am in open adoption with his first family, and will always maintain relati
I was adopted at age nine so naturally i knew i was adopted and i knew some of my biological family like my sisters. I never knew my dad he left my mom before i was born. the family i was in adopted has been adopting kids like crazy no matter their age and they always make sure you knew you were adopted and that it wasnt bad because you were the chosen one out of all the kids they could have adopted. I personally think not trying to hide that your child is adopted from them is the best way to go. telling them when they are like 3-5 is probally the best time because they would understand it a little more than if you told them when they were like 1 or 2. I was runited with my family in 2008 and finally met my biological father but wish i never had met him. my adoptive family had lied to me and told me they knew nothing of him when they actually had a huge file on him. my biological mother is amazing but was just way to over whelmed with all of us girls and she couldnt just give up my two
I am both an adoptee and an adoptive parent. I was told so early that honestly I don’t remember being told, and we did the same with our children. I have always felt that a parent waits until a child is much older, then the child would have more of a likelihood to have a harder time coping with adoption. When someone keeps something from someone even if they feel it is in the best interest of the child or other person, it can back fire later. I have heard stories where parents don’t tell their child and they find out later through someone else, and it can be devastating.
