When called “Balloon Dude” by a waitress in a breakfast restaurant, I respond with “Yes, Pancake Chick?
• If when I’m leaving a table, a lady at another table says “Hey! Where’s my balloon?” I’ll walk over dig through my bag, pull out a balloon, reach over and very carefully hand it to her, then walk off. It’s “abuse” for the sake of entertainment and fun, but I “suck up” big time afterwards. • Make a rabbit’s head and ears. Pause and say, “How do you like my rabbit ears… I usually get a good reception!” (When only one or two grown ups laugh I usually crib the old chestnut, “Thanks, I need the pity.”) I explain to kids that this is a grown up joke. • “What’s the difference between a poor marksman and a constipated owl? A poor marksman shoots and shoots but never hits.” • “Just let me say this, kids.
