WHAT KEEPS US FROM SETTING BOUNDARIES?
1. Fear of aloneness. Perhaps you may have experienced abandonment and will give up many parts of yourself to keep from feeling alone. 2. Idolatry. Another person becomes indispensable and when one feels rejection is intolerable. 3. Guilt. Others may know how to manipulate you and withdraw love if you n any time I make a move toward separateness. If being independent in any way is tied to a loss of love, you may feel guilty if you try to be separate. 4. You believe you are loving when in fact you are enabling. Enabling is taking responsibility for another’s feeling, behaviors or choices that is rightfully theirs. You may enable another to be irresponsible by controlling and taking responsibility for their attitudes, feelings and actions. Giving to an abusive person who denies responsibility makes the problem worse. If you don’t set limits on evil it only gets bigger. TASKS TO LEARN TO DRAW BOUNDARIES 1. Learn to choose non-controlling people to bond too. Have more than one supportive r
