What is the definition of perfect pitch?
When you get the viola into the toilet without hitting the sides. • What is the definition of a major seventh? A violist playing octaves. • What is the difference between the first and last desk of a viola section? A semi-tone. • When a 16-inch viola and a 17-inch viola are dropped simultaneously from a 30-story building, which one hits the pavement first? It doesn’t matter. • What is the difference between a violin and a viola? A viola burns longer. • What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common? Everyone is happy when the case is closed. • How do you keep your violin from getting stolen? Put it in a viola case. • What is the difference between a violist and a terrorist? Terrorists have sympathizers. • Why are violas larger than violins? They’re not. The violist’s head is smaller. • How do you make a violist play vibrato? Write a whole note and put “SOLO” over it. • How can you tell when a violist is playing out of tune? The bow is moving. • How do you make a violin sound like a viola
