What is the best made up excuse to avoid Jury duty?
No one should ever make up an excuse to avoid jury duty. It is what responsible citizens do as part of their adult citizen responsibility. That said, if you look into the jury system you will find the “Fully Informed Jury” on the internet. This organization represents the way that juries were intended to exist by the Founders. In fact until the 1880s judges instructed jury members in their responsibilities of being a fully informed jury member. Today most judges and prosecutors do not like people who openly follow such Founder philosophy and will excuse them from jury duty. But again, to just take the attitude to not want to serve (which is the way your question came through) is not right. By the way, to follow some of the advice you’re being given here and lie is in fact an offense with which the judge can fine you if he finds out that is what you are doing. Then too most of the excuses you are being given here are not acceptable to the court. Just serve and serve gladly.
