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What do most parents believe is the best real alternative to spanking?

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What do most parents believe is the best real alternative to spanking?

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Effective Methods of Discipline Here are some effective ways to discipline your child without spanking them: 1. Call time outs. In a time-out, a child is safely isolated from her family or peers for short periods of time — generally a minute for each year of age. This gives her time to cool off. Example: If your child gets angry with another child, put your child in her playpen or send her to her room. After the time-out, you and your child can discuss solutions to the problem that just occurred. 2. Illustrate the consequences of bad behavior. The best way to let a child know she’s done something wrong is to make the point that undesirable acts can often have undesirable results. Example: If you can’t get your child to clean up her room, remove every toy she’s left on the floor until there’s precious little left to play with. Just be sure your child is old enough to understand the connection between her action and the punishment. 3. Treat chronic problems in a variety of ways. Changin

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A parent writes, “I know spanking is not the right way to deal with my children’s behavior. But that does little to help. It would be very helpful if you would tell me some alternatives. What to do when you are very angry and want to slap your child on the bottom. How to diffuse your own anger. There must be some good books you can recommend…” Variations of this request have been put to me many times. I wince inwardly when I hear them coming because I know that I am unable to offer the kind of answer that is being sought. I know that no matter what I say, it will probably sound like an evasion. Let me try to explain why it is impossible for me to give what I believe many parents are looking for; good new behaviors that can easily be substituted for the bad ones, as if it were as simple as switching to a superior brand of cooking oil. We live at a time when the media are full of expert advice on how to solve all our personal problems. How to properly bring up children is one of the mo

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