WHAT ARE THE KEY SKILLS FOR MANAGING CONFLICT?
The following communication skills will help you deal with conflicts in your family: • Use I-statements instead of you-statements. They sound less accusing and place the responsibility for the statement on you. For example: I would like you to empty the dishwasher before you leave, not You need to empty the dishwasher before you leave. • Avoid name-calling and put-downs. They are inflammatory and only make the other person defensive and angry, thereby escalating the conflict. • Soften your tone. Listen to how you sound. A softer, friendlier tone of voice helps lessen the hostility of your message. • Take a time-out. Some families have an agreement to make the time-out sign (make a “T” with your hands) when a discussion escalates into an argument. Say, “Let’s take a break and cool down, and agree on how long the time-out should be. Then come back when the time is up. • Acknowledge the other person’s point of view. It is not necessary to agree. For example: • I hear what you are saying o
