Sometimes I dream that Peter Scolari is my math teacher. Why?
Well, the answer to this question is crystal clear. You have that dream because Peter Scolari is a great, great American, more so than any other. Mr. Scolari is a fine actor and a gracious human being, and if that bastard Tom Hanks thinks he’s more talented than the handsome and witty Peter Scolari, well, he can die! Mr. Scolari is easily more talented as that fucker Hanks, and quite obviously was the superior Bosom Buddy. It’s not even close. I just know that he could’ve done twice as much with the material Hanks botched in “Big”, and I am positive that Private Ryan would’ve had far fewer worries had Mr. Peter Scolari been there to save him rather than that inferior nincompoop Hanks. I am shocked, saddened, and disturbed at the shockingly and unjustifiably unequal career paths of these two men. Lord, have mercy on Tom Hanks, a sinner. Thank you.
