Should couples consult a special type of counsellor?
Yes. It is generally better to see a counsellor who has been trained in couple counselling. The main focus of the work is on the relationship and what each wants from the other. Whether the problem has to do with sex, money, power, or boredom the first step is to find a way to communicate. My role as counsellor is to help the couple explore the pattern of behaviour in their relationship and facilitate communication with each other and within themselves. Frequently, I find that people are unaware of their reactions and the impact that these have on their partner. They are often shocked when they discover they have been treating the other with anger, contempt or hatred. Self-protective reactions, which may have been learned in childhood, continue inappropiately into adult life. Acknowledging these reactions is the first important step in understanding and managing them In my experience this work helps the couple to find a way to be more open and trusting of each other and so develop thei
