Our 4-year old little girl is dying and it is hard to imagine any possible value in this experience. How can we possibly find anything worthwhile in this awful time?
A. It seems profane to even consider the possibility of anything worthwhile coming out of your daughter’s dying. If this time does have value, it may only be apparent years from now as you look back. Attempting to find meaning in the illness and death of a child can become a trap for parents. There will probably never be satisfactory answers for why this has occurred. The loss of a child may be truly meaningless. Perhaps the tragedy of a child’s death is only outweighed by the miracle of her birth. More than one grieving parent has found meaning in balancing the sense of tragedy by considering the time they had together as a precious gift. The developmental landmarks that I referred to in the book apply in different ways with young children. The key landmarks are concerned with achieving self-acceptance, self-worth, a love of self and the capacity to feel the love of others. These landmarks are more readily accessible to children; the younger they are, the less they have to unlearn. Ch
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