How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
The answer to this age old question has perplexed people for eons. Part of the reason the question is so difficult to answer is that the amount of wood that woodchucks would chuck on a given day varies greatly with the seasons and with the metabolisms of any individual woodchuck. Modern internet technology has advanced to the point that we can reliably monitor the amount a woodchuck chucks in real time. The results of this monitoring are shown below. Please note that the numbers vary due to the dispositions of the woodchucks involved. Attention: Woodchucks don’t chuck unless you use Microsoft Internet Explorer as your browser…. Netscape scares them. Average amount of wood a woodchuck would chuck in a given day butt cords of wood. Median amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck in a given hour butt cords of wood. Record high for woodchuck wood chucking of butt cords was attained on .(NOTE: the above tabulations take into account that woodchuks chuck no wood on February second, in observ
— R.F.B., Arlington, Virginia Are you kidding? Everybody knows a woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. Next you’ll be wanting to know why she sells seashells by the seashore. LIKE I DIDN’T SEE THIS ONE COMING Dear Cecil: Now that you mention it, why does she sell seashells by the seashore? –Agate, Washington, D.C. Dear Agate: Because if, by way of alternative, she simply did seashell shucking whilst she sat, we’d all be in big trouble. POETRY AIN’T GOOD ENOUGH FOR HIM Dear Cecil: With regard to how much wood a woodchuck could chuck, etc., I am happy to say that science marches on, and the quaint but oh-so- unscientific answer you gave has been replaced with a modern one. See the enclosed article in the Wall Street Journal. –Randy B., Los Angeles Dear Randy: The article reports on the work of New York state wildlife expert Richard Thomas, who found that a woodchuck could (and does) chuck around 35 cubic feet of dirt in the cours
He’d chuck all the wood that a woodchuck could cause a woodchuck could chuck wood. The groundhog (Marmota monax), also known as woodchuck, is a rodent of the family Sciuridae, belonging to the group of large ground squirrels known as marmots. For more information on woodchucks, visit the source below. The etymology of the name woodchuck is unrelated to wood or chucking. It stems from an Algonquian name for the animal (possibly Narragansett), wuchak. The apparent relationship between the two words has led to the common tongue-twister: “How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?”. Various response lines can answer this, including: “As much wood as a woodchuck would if a woodchuck could chuck wood.”[9] “A woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood.”[10] “A woodchuck would chuck all the wood, if a woodchuck only could.”[11] “A woodchuck would chuck all the wood he could, if a woodchuck could chuck wood.” “361.9
He would chuck wood if HE could chuck wood, but he can’t, so the answer is none. or A woodchuck would chuck all the wood, if a woodchuck only could. Woodchucks, also called groundhogs are members of the rodent family Marmota monax— and belongs to the group of mammals Rodentia, which includes squirrels, prairie dogs, and chipmunks. They are herbivorous and dine mainly on insects,grasses and the tender shoots of new growth plants.They are destructive to crops.Farmers hate them and hunt them with a vengeance. They live in the top half of the north American continent.Wood chucks do NOT chuck wood- (chuck means gnaw) it is a myth.Their larger cousins, the beaver, chuck wood to build their dams. A stocky four legged ground animal with a face that is pudgy with a large nose and a black tail. Has been known to climb trees up to 10 feet high.: Among North American rodents, only beavers and porcupines are larger than the marmots. Woodchucks are stocky little animals with a flattened head. They c
