How Do You Win An Ugly Christmas Sweater Contest?
‘Tis the season to be ugly, at least if you want to win an ugly Christmas sweater contest. Follow these simple rules, and you are sure to come in first place. Go to a thrift store, and find an ugly Christmas sweater that even your craziest aunt would never wear. These can cost anywhere between $3.00 to $25.00. The sweater should be in a particularly bright obnoxious color, and have a large picture of something holiday-related on the front. Get a string of 15 battery operated Christmas lights from your local drug store. These should cost about $4.00. Don’t forget to get batteries. Turn sweater inside out. Poke the lights through the weave of the sweater in strategic places, for example, around a wreath or Christmas tree design on the sweater. Set the Christmas lights to “flash” mode to highlight the grotesquerie. Win the ugly Christmas sweater contest.
