How Do You Get Through The Bargaining Stage Of Grief?
Grief is not only difficult because we feel difficult feelings. It is also difficult because we think difficult thoughts. According to one of the early researchers in grief, Elisabeth Kubler Ross, there are five stages of grief. Since her original studies, we have discovered more and more about these stages, including the fact that they do not happen in any specific order. These stages are: denial, anger, sorrow or depression, bargaining, and finally acceptance. I call these “stages of acceptance” because anytime we are trying to adjust to a new or difficult reality, we go through these stages. One of the most difficult stages is bargaining. The reason for this difficulty is that we can play all kinds of tricks on ourselves in this stage. Basically, the bargain goes something like this: If I….then you’ll. The first step in overcoming the bargaining stage of grief is to learn about your bargains. Bargaining can literally go on for years after a difficult reality has occured. It’s a ki
