How Do You Avoid Screwing Up A Friendship When Travelling Together?
I’ve travelled several times with friends who are on larger and smaller budgets. Money is a bitch to have to discuss on vacation — avoid it at all costs. Everytime, we’ve usually just gone our separate ways on hotels. It’s a good time to separate and get out of each other’s hair. Three weeks is a lot of time to spend around another couple. The airline thing seems to be her own issue — it’s great to chat during the flight, but we always chose the cheapest flight in that case. Other transportation costs we always shared equally. Food-wise, I would say to be open to splurge a little. And also be exploring. If your friend is only eating at the hotels, put some initiative into it and look for other places to eat that happen to be cheaper. Don’t bring money into it, only the exploration. All-in-all, I would say that you shouldn’t feel pressured to spend money. Step out on your own for a bit if something really is too steep. But you have to show the initiative in that, and not just whine th
Your budget is your business. Figure out what you’re comfortable with (including the things you’re willing to compromise on — say, you’re willing to spend on fancier dinners by doing the old bread/cheese/fruit from a market routine for lunch), and stick to it. Having said that, it’s your responsibility to explain this — directly, calmly, and non-defensively — to your friend, so that she understands the alternative arrangements you will be making. Note that I did not say that you should ask for your friend’s permission or approval. She may very well not “approve.” She may try to convince you (either directly or passive-aggressively) to spend the extra money, regardless of your financial situation. If so, this will say an awful lot about her, and not much about you. Communication is a big part of friendship; so is mutual respect. If you communicate honestly with her and she still doesn’t respect your situation, then the ruination of the friendship isn’t on your shoulders. And Europe i
It is very difficult to travel with someone who has different ideas about travel budget. You need to make extremely clear to her what you exact budget situation is, while also accomodating to her. “I can eat an expensive (and define expensive) dinner every 4 days. But that will require soup and sandwiches for lunch.” Also, “I can only spend $X on a hotel room. I’ve researched it and these are my options: X, Y, and Z.” YOU need to be in control of your own destiny. These friends may have travelled to Europe before, but you need to get on the Internet and go to the library and start looking through travel guides so that you know exactly what the hotel and food situation is in each city you’re going to visit. There are certainly places to eat that are good and affordable and YOU need to become the expert in that topic. Unfortunately, this conversation should have happened before your trip was purchased. I have never travelled with people with significantly larger budgets than me, but perh
