How can I overcome my fear of intimidating/aggressive people?
Well I think I can relate to your situation. I was in a way intimidated by agressive people and found that if you take it one small step at a time, it will help you. What I’m trying to say is: Let’s say that out of all the intimidating situations you have been in you come across one small situation where you can say or do something to turn it around; like for example, a co-worker asks you to do something that you don’t have time to do, you want to say yes to avoid any confrontation but you literally don’t have the time. Try saying “No, I am not going to have the time to take care of that for you”. Don’t appologize or add any extra verbage that shows you are trying to ease the situation. This will put you at more of a point of agression than the other person. It may not be a relavent situation for you but it’s all I can think of at the moment. Please email me if you can give me some specific details so I can relate a little better. Your situation can be tough to deal with and I would li
It’ll take some time to turn this deeply ingrained negative picture of yourself around. Low self esteem and insecurity can be attributed to your parents, siblings, bullies and sometimes teachers. It is the feelings of low self esteem and insecurity that cause you to feel inadequate and unprepared to counter those aggressive and soulless individuals who pride themselves in their gift of intimidation. Please read some self help books on this subject and don’t be afraid to consult a professional regarding your problem. Get help and stop living this way or else you’re going to always feel lesser than those rude people and that’s the farthest thing from the truth. You’re a good gentle person that doesn’t deserve the intimidation and humiliation that you’re presently experiencing.
I know exactly what you mean. I was tired of people not taking me seriously. People who think they can just take advantage of my being nice. I wish I could explain every thing to you right here, but it would be easier for me just to tell you what I did. There’s a book, called The Gentle Art of Verbal Self Defense: http://www.amazon.com/Gentle-Verbal-Self… You really need to read that. It tells you HOW to speak to people and express yourself in a way that will not incite violence. But in my own opinion, you just need to know WHAT you can do to people that piss you off. I hadn’t been in a fight for a long time, and I had quit drinking and smoking for a while. Consequently, I felt defenseless and naked. The alcohol gave me confidence, even when I wasn’t drinking during the day. The smoking made me a little more senseless. Knowing how to fight and knowing that I could beat the everlov
