How can I be a better waiter?
After reading the thread, two more: – There is one waiter I cannot stand at a restaurant I frequent because he speaks way too fast. I seriously have to have him repeat everything he ever says to me. Not to mention how it feels like he’s rushed, so then I guess I should be rushed so I can let him get on with his work. I am under 30 so I should have no problem understanding most people, but with this fool I do. – To agree with many above: used flatware does not go back on the table. Give me a clean replacement. No question. I also do my best to code to waitstaff with my flatware. Together at an angle = my meal is complete. Separate knife and fork = still eating. This useful bit of etiquette seems to have vanished from eras long past. Be aware of this symbolism and you will blow my mind.
Thanks for all the great advice, everybody. It’s generally pretty obvious to me when a table wants me to chat or make a lot of corny jokes, and this thread has definitely reinforced the notion that unless people make it clear that they want to be entertained as well as served, unobtrusive is the way to go. While I’m still totally baffled by folks in the ‘write it all down’ school of thought, from the number of responses I reckon it might be good policy to whip out a pen and pad even if I’m not going to actually use it (for the record, I always feel like my recall as to who ordered what is much better if I make the mental effort to remember when I take the order, but I can see how that might be unnerving, especially with a big party).
Seconding, know the food. Know what’s vegetarian, and be right about it. I’ve had waiters tell me some tapas item is vegetarian, but when it comes it has prosciutto or a meat gravy or some damn thing. Also, this is well-trod ground, but: “No problem” does not sound gracious. It sounds like the waiter thinks the customer is asking for a special favor. (“I’d like the manchego” “No problem” — well, no shit, dude. You’re the waiter. I’m glad to hear it’s not a problem for you to take my order.) It strikes the wrong note at a nice restaurant. “Certainly”, “Yes”, even “Great” are perfectly fine alternatives for when you’re taking an order, and if the customer ever has reason to say “Thank you”, the civilized response is “you’re welcome”. Ditto the over-familiar squatting by the table (we’re not in a little league football huddle, we’re out for a lovely evening), touching a customer (WTF?), or aggressively trying to be a focus of attention (here’s my name, I’ve been in the area for so long,
The best waitress I know – the only person my husband and I request by name when we go out – is incredibly observant. A couple examples: I’d been playing around with the ketchup bottle and left it upside down, and she brought a new bottle under the assumption the bottle on the table was nearly empty. Another time, my husband removed his sweater about 10 minutes after we were seated, and the next time she came to the table, she asked if we were too warm, and would we like to move to a different table away from the heat. If I ask for water or iced tea with extra lemon, I would like fresh lemon with every refill. I get annoyed when the waiter asks me to “cut into my steak to make sure it’s cooked the way I like it” as soon as my plate is set down. Give me a minute and come back. If the guests are lingering after you’ve dropped off the check, check back – we may need another cup of coffee or have changed our minds about dessert. And speaking of dessert, don’t ask me if I’ve saved any room
Please do not ask me how is the food while I am in the process of eating and to answer you would be very rude with all that partially masticated food in the way. Also, one of the best waiters I ever had was in a dive Chinese restaurant near a university who made sure that the water glass was always full and wrote a short note on the takeaway boxes so you would know the dish and the date it was bought; that was very considerate. My best friend was a waitress and no lie, she made insanely great tips. She was always moving and observing. She made sure that her bus folks were well taken care of and she NEVER declined helping a customer even if it was not her station. Her neuroticism and clean freak ways made her natural for nursing which she later entered as a career. Here is something that always surprised me, the air of expectation of 25% or better tipping even if the service was minimal. This was an actual presentation done by more than one student/waitron in one of my courses. Like all
