Hi Auntie Sparknotes, I was wondering, wheres the line between friendship and love?
I have a new friend who’s a guy and I shared an armchair with him. I’m not thinking about dating him or anything, so should I be leaving more of a physical distance between us? Your flirting guide said that physical contact was a way to flirt with a friend, does that mean all physical contact will send that kind of message? YES. And that is why Auntie SparkNotes must insist that all your opposite-sex friendships be conducted from a safe distance of 300 feet or more, with both parties either handcuffed, duct taped, or encased in a combination of cardboard and bubble wrap in order to avoid ANY physical contact which may be mistakenly viewed as flirtatious. You can’t be too careful! …Sorry, Sparklers–I just wanted to see that one gullible kid go running off to wrap his entire body in bubble wrap. There’s always one. Hey, buddy? Buddy! It’s okay! Come back, I was just kidding! Hey! Oh my God, no, wait, don’t put duct tape on your– Nevermind. Here’s the real truth about physical contact
