Do Native Americans, witches, and Muslims pray to the same God as Christians?
No, they’ve chosen a false god in order to offend and annoy the crap out of the really, really holy people. 3. Do all people go to heaven to be with God after they die? No, some people actually go to heaven for the free food and drinks. 4. Do good people who have done their best on earth go to heaven? Only if they failed to RSVP to their invitation to the biggest and best afterlife bash – Satan’s Semi-Annual Sinners Soiree. 5. Can proud, practicing homosexuals be Christians? While it’s possible, it will hurt your homo street cred and it will certainly result in an asterisk being placed on your gay card and in your homosexual registration file. 6. Can people who have committed serious sins be truly saved by Jesus? Yes, but if you’re clever you may be able to avoid capture by the Jesus police and the subsequent mandatory enrollment in a rigorous reprogramming retreat. 7. Will there be a judgment for our sins after we die? Yes, but I’ve heard that the devil offers pro-bono representation
