Can I send a letter of condolence to an ex at his parents house?”
Think of the question behind your question. As long as you consider yourself normal, I don’t think it is ever wrong to do something that you feel is right. The fact that you feel weird and intrusive, seems to indicate you are a little torn, while you do feel you need to express you condolences. Not having any contact in the last 9 years puts a little of this in perspective as why it might feel wierd. Not attending also seems clear to you. Consider how your expression might be received? If I put myself in his place, I think I would consider it a little strange and his new wife might feel worse if you sent it to them directly. It wouldn’t seem as strange to me, if my ex sent a card to my parent’s home in this case. Then the whole ex issue seems to be avoided and it can be received as merely an expression of your feelings to the larger family from someone that cared about the person that passed, not even specifically to your ex. This is what I would do in your place. Another thing you can
