Who is Kearney?
Kearney Zzyzwicz is one of the school bullies. Kearney is the toughest (and the ugliest) bully in Nelson’s gang. Kearney is also pretty fat for his age. Kearney has a buzz haircut. Kearney wears a white short-sleeved torn shirt (sometimes red with 1 white stripe at the bottom of the shirt, as shown in the video game, The Simpsons Hit & Run), dark blue torn short pants, dark blue shoes, and dog collar bangles on his wrists. Kearney resembles somewhat of a caveman. In “24 Minutes,” it is revealed that Kearney owns his own tuxedo, although he isn’t seen wearing it. He is 22 years old. He has a father named Kearney, Sr., a mother named Mrs. Zzyzwicz. Although he looks (and sounds) to be around Jimbo or Dolph Starbeam’s age, Kearney has a young son named Little Kearney (it is not known, who the mother is, although Kearney once says that his divorce was hard on his kid, but he got through it okay), the only present Springfield Elementary School student, that celebrated the United States Bice
