Can affairs help a marriage?
Mostly, no. People ask this question to justify what is happening in their lives. But in my experience an affair only helps a marriage in two situations. • Where one person in the marriage hates sex and is relieved that the partner gets sexual satisfaction elsewhere. So, a blind eye is turned and as long as the affair doesn’t get too emotional, the marriage – such as it is – is preserved. • When a married person has a fling with someone but learns through that experience that he or she is still in love with the marital partner and is far better off at home. In this situation the marriage can be strengthened, but only so long as the innocent party has no idea that the affair took place. If the wandering partner feels the need to confess, he or she should confide in a priest, doctor or counsellor. Off-loading guilt on a spouse will not help anyone and may even precipitate the end of the marriage after all.
